Knoxville, Tenn. - Tuesday, July 19, 2016

There was a situation this past Tuesday at the newly renovated RBI facility located in the fashionable warehouse district of the Deane Hill neighborhood.  It was eerily reminiscent of six years ago when Ken Bodie, CEO of the Advanced Workout Group from Cherokee Country Club made his first and only visit to RBI.  See link below to be reminded of this epic workout by Mr. Bodie.

http://sevenfatguys.blogspot.com/2010/07/rbi-v-ccc.html

As mentioned above, the RBI facility has been the recipient of much needed new equipment. Donations have been pouring in and those who have visited in the past would not recognize the workout area of the warehouse.  Heating and air conditioning are still on the donation list and a Go Fund Me page is in the works to see if heat can be in place before the winter solstice.

The director of RBI, Bryan "B-Rod" Rodriguez normally trains the 7:00 am class on Tuesdays and Thursdays at RBI known to most as "Jerry's Kids".  When the class arrived this morning, they were surprised and shocked to see Geraldo "G-man" Orta, former University of Tennessee football star and one of the trainers of the Advanced Workout Group at Cherokee waiting to instruct the group.  After four sets of "warm-ups" which included decline bench presses, decline butterfly's and band stretches, Mr. Orta informed the group that they would be participating in the 1,000 rep challenge.

Things were going fairly well with the group and there were really no issues with the challenge until the final event.  When the two-minute plate push was announced, Jerry, namesake of the group, flatly refused to complete the challenge.  After a few choice words, the rest of the class agreed to participate. As you can see in the pictures from both Ken Bodie's attempt and today's plate pushes, the green astro turf is still in place at RBI.  For those of you who have experienced this turf then you know it dates back some 50 plus years when the inventors of the turf used the RBI facility to test the first run of the material.

As seen above, the Very Rev. David Boettner, Rector of Sacred Heart Cathedral, had some difficulty with the turf but ultimately was able to finish although not in the allotted timeframe.  Fr. David was heard calling for the Very Rev. John Ross, Rector of St. John's Episcopal Cathedral who is also a member of Jerry's Kids.  Fr. John was suspiciously absent from today's workout and it has been reported that he had been tipped off that today's workout would end with plate pushes.  Although Fr. David's speech was unintelligible, it is believed he was calling on Fr. John to invoke the Holy Spirit to exorcise whatever demons might be possessing him.

It has been rumored that Mr. Kirk Icuss, another member of the group has had ties to the Italian Mafia in the past.  Mr. Icuss, a descendant of the Iacovissi family also has connections with the Morelli family and has indicated that should Mr. Orta return to the RBI facility certain "contracts" may be executed.

In the future it is probably best that the "country club" types, and their trainers, stay on their side of the tracks.

Where was the TURTLE today?

Breaking News from the Advanced Workout Group Friday, April 26, 2013

It appears that John F., fondly known as Grape Ape, has finally found an exercise that he enjoys.

John spent several inconsistent years with the prestigious Advanced Workout Group (AWG) at Cherokee Country Club. John was a chronic complainer and always seemed to be in search of the ultimate exercise; one he described as 'I wish I could just stand around and lose weight'.

During John's combative and short-lived tenure with the AWG, he strayed several times...

John joined the ladies Koko Fit Club with a six-month trial membership and was asked to leave after three visits due to his uncontrollable flatulence.

John then joined the Outdoor Boot Camp Club for several weeks, but mysteriously injured his back while gawking at the other female participants.

Just as John was hitting rock-bottom in his search for the ultimate easy exercise, he stumbled across the Belly-Jiggling Weight Loss Machine in the basement of Cherokee Country Club while visiting his wine locker.

The AWG would like to wish John the best of luck in his new exercise endeavor!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

BAND OF (BODIE) BROTHERS

Knoxville, Tenn. - May 12, 2011 -- Larry Bodie, youngest brother of two of the founding members of the Advanced Workout Group reported to workouts today at the RBI facility. Larry, the very successful CEO of a well known local IT services company attempted to join the group now affectionately known as "Jerry's Kids".

Bryan Rodriguez, director of the RBI location, paired Larry with the namesake of the group and the Very Reverend David Boettner thinking Larry could handle the less strenuous workout the two are known for. Larry did fairly well until the bosu pushup segment that left him muttering "someone promised me there would be beer here".

At one point in the workout, it appeared that Father David might have to perform the Sacrament of the Sick more commonly known as "Last Rites". It was then pointed out by Kirk Icuss that even though Larry had recently signed a lucrative IT services contract with Sacred Heart Cathedral, he had not yet converted to the one true and holy apostolic church. Father David confirmed this report but indicated a deal had been struck that could see Larry's entire company attending services at the Cathedral in the next few weeks.

Others in the group compared Larry's visit with that of his middle brother Ken in July of last year. You might recall from an earlier report that Ken had quite a bit of trouble with plate pushes. It was pointed out to Larry the he was indeed fortunate that Miss Elise Icuss was not returning to the workout group until next week as she returns home for the summer break. Miss Icuss is known for her sharp wit and physical prowess as she almost brought Ken to tears at his first and ONLY visit to RBI last summer.

As Larry left the facility, he could be heard calling his office to officially take a "sick day". The group really hopes that Larry returns next week as there is a slight chance their daily rate from PTI could be reduced by as much as $1.35.

Grape Ape Like Cars

Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words.

The Advanced Workout Group Alumni Report

THE ONCE AND FUTURE KING

Jerry Bodie, an alumnus of the Advanced Workout Group continues to have great success in his life after having been “counseled out” of the Advanced Workout Group several years earlier. After drifting aimlessly for a while, Jerry found a new home at RBI and started the now famous Tuesday/Thursday “Jerry’s Kids” workout team. In addition to his world travels and half marathon training, Jerry continues to be active in his church and community. On a recent Friday night, Jerry was observed at Cherokee Country Club enjoying exclusive access to the Nine O’clock Cotillion Board Room in the Old Grill after a well-received master of ceremonies performance on behalf of the ladies of the Cotillion. Jerry’s pleasing baritone, his proper enunciation, and his exacting syntax all combined to result in one of the most talked about emcee performances at Nine O’clock Cotillion in many years.
This buffo performance in service of the beautiful ladies of Nine O’clock, his many community service commitments, and his present seat on the Board of Cherokee Country Club all point to one more future accomplishment to add to Jerry’s already very full resume………

A future King of Nine O’clock Cotillion!!!

Congratulations, Jerry, on all your success after leaving the Advanced Workout Group and keep up the great work! You make us proud!

“Roid-Rage” in Africa, 50+ Animals Dead, Myers Injured

AP Wire, Knoxville, TN

What began as a “sight-seeing” Safari tour in Africa turned deadly for over fifty innocent animals ranging from Giraffes to Zebras. It appears that once again, illegal steroid use was the cause of spontaneous violence.

According to witnesses, Dr. W. , a member of the Advanced Work-Out Group from Cherokee Country Club, Knoxville, TN, experienced involuntary rage while participating in an innocent wild-life sightseeing tour in Africa this past July. Allegedly Dr. W. had not worked out in several days and his pent up rage caused him to overtake the Safari guide and abscond with his high-powered rifle. When all the smoke cleared, over fifty wild animals (of which several were endangered) were dead.

When told of Dr. W's acts, fellow work-out companion, David J., had the following statement:

“I am not surprised that Dr. W experienced this bout of rage. On several occasions Dr. W. has threatened me as I was not able to perform the ‘full body length pull-ups’ to his satisfaction. I feared if he went more than two days without working-out to release his rage that someone, or something, was going to be in danger. It saddens me that several innocent animals were killed just because Dr. W. could not exercise his steroid induced demons under the guidance of B-Rod, his personal trainer. This explains why Dr. W has not been attending our work-out sessions the past few weeks.”

Local authorities were finally able to restrain Dr. W. after he pulled several back and chest muscles trying to lift his kill into the back of the sight-seeing all-terrain vehicle. Dr. W. is being held in Africa until his court date of August 15th.