With the latest blog entry by Greg, I am saddened to see a new low in the viciousness of personal attacks on this blog. Before this entry, there were some good natured back and forth jabs between the various groups, but the latest comment represents an unsubstantiated and unprovoked attack on the good character of one of the leaders and founders of the advanced group, Ken “The Body."

I have not commented on this blog previously, but these comments are really unwarranted and I feel deserve a response. I don’t know of anyone who conducts themselves with more integrity and an attitude of “Think Clean”, than Ken “The Body." This “Think Clean” attitude is not just displayed in his personal life and career, but also in his workout routine. To think that Ken “The Body” uses performance enhancing chemicals (Viagra prescriptions excluded) is unwarranted and unfounded. However, I would like to shed some secrets of the “advanced” group that might better explain some of the incredible advances in strength and stamina that members of the “beginners” group have rightly (and enviously) noted. If you were to arrive at one of our 5:30 am group warm up and planning sessions, you might note some members of the “advanced” group receiving injections in their buttocks. This is nothing more than B-12 shots to help get the day started with an adequate dose of vitamins, but I can see how this might create some confusion as to the possible use of enhancements. The cream that you might see other members of the “advanced” group rubbing on their body is nothing more than a highly effective anti-fungal cream that offers outstanding protection while working out and using the shower facilities at 180 Fitness. It should be noted that all members of the advanced group are certified free of athlete’s foot and jock itch as a result of carefully following this weekly program.

The increase in aggression, hair loss, and back acne by certain members of the “advanced” group have more to do with life frustrations, age, and heavy sweating, respectively, than from the use of performance enhancements as suggested by the post. The marked shrinkage in testicular size experienced by certain members of the group, however, is still yet unexplained. The highly regarded Knoxville urologist Christopher Harris, M.D., F.A.C.S. was recently invited into the “advanced” group to investigate this phenomenon and also serve as the group’s medical director and consultant on optimal Viagra dosage levels.

Lastly, I feel the need to respond to a personal attack and cheap shot in the latest entry. As most everyone in the Knoxville area knows, the Bearden High School band, with its fancy uniforms and hats, innovative marching routines, beautiful majorettes, and precision flag twirlers, is a much sought-after group to be a part of while in high school. Unfortunately, as Greg knows very well, I did not have the required musical talent or social standing to be a part of the Bearden band during my high school days and was shunned by most of the band elites during this formative period of my life. As a result, I was forced instead to try to and find companionship and camaraderie by playing sports, hanging out with my friends, and dating girls instead being a part of this elitist group that got to have fun at band camp in the summer and had reserved seats and got to wear their cool uniforms at high school football games in the fall. Thanks a lot Greg for opening up these old wounds just when I was starting to get over this rejection. Can’t we leave high school issues behind and just work out together like the adults we are today?